“I’m scared mom. Should I do it?”
“What if I fall off?” “What if I don’t like it?” “What if I get hurt?”
It’s ok to feel scared Alexis. Everyone feels scared right before they do something they’ve never done before. Remember when we were at Great Wolf Lodge and you wanted to go down the big slide but you felt scared? Then you built up the courage and went down anyways… do you remember how you felt after you went down the slide?
“Yes. It was so fun. I loved it.” “Ok. I’ll do it…”
Before I learned the 4 C’s Formula to build confidence created by Dan Sullivan I practiced anchoring confidence to good feelings with my daughter so that the next time she felt scared to try something she could recall the good feelings that are associated with confidence or triumph. So far, it’s working like a charm.
Dan Sullivan, the founder of Strategic Coach created the concept of the 4 C’s Formula, which beautifully explains the 4-part process of creating confidence.
The reality is that most of us continuously think about a bigger, better and supposedly easier ways to grow our businesses. The constant stream of never-ending ideas usually leads to inaction because you don’t end up committing to anything.
Since you are too busy changing your focus and direction you never seem to move forward or achieve the results you desire which depletes your confidence and puts you into further inaction.
When I learned Dan’s 4 C’s Formula this past week at my Strategic Coach session it immediately resonated and I knew I had to share this with you.
As you can see confidence is actually the last step in the formula. Before you get to the good feelings that having confidence brings, you must work through the first 3 steps…
It’s been my experience that most new health practitioners, healers and coaches get tripped up on the first step: commitment.
Without a clear commitment to achieve realistic goals you can’t advance to the second step… courage.
It’s the courage part that feels really yucky because you have no proof that what you’ve committed to will work out. So you stop yourself before you even start because you’re scared.
That’s where faith in your passion and abilities comes in.
Courage = stepping outside of your comfort zone.
Building up courage allows you to create the capabilities to succeed. You’ve got to move through fear to demonstrate to yourself that you’ve got what it takes.
And on the other side of fear is freedom… or confidence.
Don’t expect to find the confidence right from the start. That’s not the way it works (don’t shoot the messenger).
So if you are stuck in your business and waiting to feel confident before you start remember the formula… remember that confidence only comes after you commit, move through fear and build up new skills (capabilities). Once you’ve done all of that you feel like a rock star and nothing can stop you… that’s confidence.
All of this is to say that feeling fear and lack of confidence is a completely normal part of building a business. It happens to all of us.
“You have plenty of courage, I am sure,” answered Oz. “All you need is confidence in yourself. There is no living thing that is not afraid when it faces danger. The true courage is in facing danger when you are afraid, and that kind of courage you have in plenty.”
So the next time the fear creeps up, recognize it for what it really is… a gateway to confidence.